[00:00.00]People will do anything to see a free show — even if it is a bad one. #
人们总要想尽办法看不花钱的演出——哪怕是拙劣的演出。#
[00:06.47]When the news got round that a comedy show would be presented at our local cinema by the P. and U. Bird Seed Company, we all rushed to see it.#
当“皮尤”鸟食公司将在我们当地影院演出喜剧节目的消息传开后，我们都赶紧跑去观看。#
[00:19.72]We had to queue for hours to get in and there must have been several hundred people present just before the show began. #
我们不得不排了好几个小时才进得场去。在演出开始前场内肯定已有好几百人了。#
[00:28.96]Unfortunately, the show was one of the dullest we have ever seen. #
不幸的是，这次演出是我们看过的最乏味的演出了。#
[00:35.11]Those who failed to get in need not have felt disappointed, as many of the artistes who should have appeared did not come. #
那些没能进到场内的人没有必要感到失望，因为很多应该出场的专业演员都没有来。#
[00:44.90]The only funny things we heard that evening came from the advertiser at the beginning of the programme. #
那天晚上唯一有趣的事情是节目开始时那个报幕员的开场白。#
[00:52.32]He was obviously very nervous and for some minutes stood awkwardly before the microphone. #
他显然非常紧张，局促不安地在麦克风前站了好几分钟。#
[01:00.32]As soon as he opened his mouth, everyone burst out laughing. #
但他刚一开口说话，人们便哄堂大笑起来。#
[01:06.22]We all know what the poor man should have said, but what he actually said was: #
我们都明白那个可怜的人应该说些什么，而他实际说的却是：#
[01:14.13]”This is the Poo and Ee Seed Bird Company. Good ladies, evening and gentlemen!”#
“这是‘浦伊’鸟食公司，好女士们，晚上和先生们！”
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